and my heart to rest on the bottomless floor.
like a childhood bedtime storybook. familiar, yet far.
my memory flashes back to the night on the field.
you gave up your sweater, naturally, as i was shivering.
you mentioned the strange, starry sky- something was different, and it made you feel uneasy.
i kicked around sand and somehow, through my chattering teeth, reminisced aloud my past years playing on that field.
there was so much i wanted in that moment, merely frozen.
at some point you awkwardly put your arms around me to keep me warm, we hugged.
i want to kiss you, i thought. yet somehow i couldn't.
kiss me, kiss me, my thoughts kicked repeatedly- giddy and naive.
but too soon you let go, glanced at me and we walked.
bravely i took your hand in mine and held it for a brief second.
from your hand there was warmth.
from your heartbeat- unease.
and you let your hand go- as if to search for something else to do with it.
and at that moment i knew."